Feeling Worthless – Conversations With Anxiety #08

Snapshots of the conversations that are had between anxiety and I: the things we fight over, the discussions and debates we take part in and the struggle to reason with irrationality. Some of these are based on past events or reoccurring battles, some on more recent occasions, and some are simply extrapolations of experiences I’ve had.

Depression: We are so worthless.

Me: Huh?

Depression: I mean, look at us, literally what is the point.

Me: That’s a little negative, don’t you think?

Depression: Well what is there to be positive about?

Me: A lot of things! Such as–

Anxiety: Yeah, no, we’re incapable of the most basic things, I’d say that’s pretty worthless.

Me: Hey, I was talking, and actually that’s not entirely true, we managed to–

Anxiety: Why are you still trying? It’s two against one.

Depression: Yeah, there’s seriously no point.

Me: Well, if this really is a democracy, which seems to be what you’re suggesting, then don’t you think I should at least be allowed to voice my opinion?

Depression: …

Anxiety: …

Depression: Pffff, fine. You have a point.

Me: Where to start–

Depression: Perhaps nowhere?

Me: Shhhh.

Anxiety: Come on, let’s make this quick.

Depression: That it definitely will be.

Me: Okay so, we’re not worthless because we help other people and we want to make the world a better place. We do our best and work hard when we can, we bring others happiness and even bring happiness to ourself a lot of the time – that’s pretty amazing, and–

Depression: Ugh, where’s the vomit bucket?

Me: –at the end of the day, I don’t think there really needs to be a justification. We deserve to be here just as much as anyone else.

Anxiety: Agh stop! This is too OVERWHELMING. Can you just stop speaking so fast, I can’t take it all in.

Depression: Arguing is exhausting, I really can’t be bothered with this. You two battle this one out.

Anxiety: Oh my god, no. I don’t want the spotlight, or the responsibility and time pressure. Count me OUT.

Me: …If no one has a convincing counter argument, does that mean I’ve won?

Anxiety: …

Depression: …

Me: Come on guys, you know there are plenty of great things about us.

Anxiety: Well not plenty…

Me: At least some then?

Anxiety: Fine. We’re not completely worthless.

Depression: Can we go back to bed now?

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Read the rest of the series:

Going Shopping #01

Job Hunting #02

Ordering Food #03

Starbucks Sickness #04

The Meeting #05

At The Bank #06

Being Followed #07

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